Becoming the Change I Want to See in the World

Mohandas K. Gandhi once said some pretty powerful words that I have chosen as my mantra for life. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” From a very young age I have pondered many of life’s questions. My mom says that when I was really young, I told her that I wasn’t supposed to be here. I told her that I was supposed to be “up there” with my angels. And from a very young age, I have always drawn angels or at least my version even when I really couldn’t draw yet.  I would take a yellow highlighter and make yellow squiggly lines for my angels because I always knew that they were near. As I have gotten older, I have kept a sense that the world isn’t always as it appears and that each of us has a unique gift to offer and that we are all connected in more ways than we can see with our human eyes. So when I am asked, how I have changed or what I want to be, I just look at the world around me. If I see a happy world, I know that I am a happy person. If I see an angry world, I know that I have work to do. 

My mom has taught me from an early age that the world is a mirror and that people can only show us what is inside of us. That is what makes us all connected.  I can remember in my early years if a kid was mean to me, I would come home at night and lie down and talk to my mom about it. She would quickly point out times that I had been mean and show me that more times than not, those were not my intentions. We would then send that kid extra love because somehow we knew that was the right thing to do. I would then go to school and within a few days, a miracle would happen. The kid was nice to me and all was well. I used to come running in the house and tell my mom how exciting it was to have a new friend that was so mean before. I have always felt like I had this big secret just by knowing this one rule.

Now, trust me, it hasn’t always worked that way, especially at times now that I am older. I sometimes forget the rule, but then I come to my senses and realize that is works in every situation. My biggest lesson was when I was in fifth grade and I had a peace program during our community meeting at school. I had just been on a really cool trip with the Art Miles Project and wanted to share it. Later in the day, I got into a fight with one of my friends and called her something like a selfish brat or maybe even worse. I try to forget those moments. Anyway, I was devastated. I mean, who was I to be trying to teach peace when I couldn’t find my peace anywhere. That was when I realized what it means to be human and what my mom has been teaching me about love all my life. So when I am asked questions like, how I have changed, or how I am making a difference, or what I know a lot about now, I think back on my life and realize that we are all here to teach each other forgiveness and acceptance and to help each other be better than before.

When I think about my favorite teachers in my life or my favorite people, they have been the people who have been an example to me of a successful and happy life without even really saying anything. My favorite teachers have also been the ones who have inspired me to put myself out there, even if I made a mistake, actually encouraging me to make a mistake and helping me to learn from it. They are the people who tell me when they made the same mistake or even one worse than mine. They are the people who aren’t afraid to be human and to take those moments and help others along the way. My favorite people are the real people in my life and I am forever grateful. I guess now, I need to say a few words about my least favorite. My least favorite people in my life are the ones who act as though they have never made a mistake and are “put-off” when I make one. I mean, isn’t life all about learning? 

I also think I have learned so much from other kids around the world that I have met. Like the guys in India who have no water. It makes me realize how important water actually is and how much their lives matter to me. So now, I turn the water off while I soap up my body and then turn it back on when I rinse. I also am thankful to live where we have an abundance of water as well. I also learn from my friends at school every day. I mean, it is almost impossible to have that many kids together every day and everyone stay sane. I don’t know how the teachers do it. So, I am definitely learning some very important lessons while I am learning the other stuff. Basically, the way I see it is that it is all the same. We all have an opinion and we all have a voice and we all have different ways of seeing the world and  guess what? It all matters. We all matter, every little bit and every little person.

One of my favorite stories is when I was trying to come up with a speech for Earth Day in Birmingham a few years ago. I couldn’t think of what I wanted to say and on top of that, I was sick and didn’t feel much like writing anything. However, the day was soon approaching. A few weeks earlier, I had also had a dream that my angel came to visit me and she gave me a seed and went away. Well that was kind of crazy and my mom and I couldn’t figure out what it meant so we finally forgot about it. Then my cousin Jarah called one afternoon while my mom was hanging out with me on the bed. We were just about to watch a movie, Fern Gulley: the Last Rainforest. She asked if we had figured out the “seed dream” and we said no. So we put in the movie and snuggled in. Closer to the end of the movie, the little girl in the dream was given a seed by her mentor, just like in my dream. And then the mentor, who was an elder in the forest told her these words:

Look for the hero within yourselves and remember that within every seed is the magic and power of all creation. We all have the power, and it grows when it is shared. That power is the power of love.

Wow. That was my message. That was my speech. That was my life. That is who I aspire to be. So, even though I have changed a lot on the outside, most of my changes over the years have occurred on the inside. I am becoming the change I want to see in the world. I am happy. I am whole. I am Chloe.  

ABOUT CHLOE

essay ©2006 by chloe